Let There Be Butterflies!

So, I have this friend... let's call him "Jack". We were chatting recently and commiserating about our current (somewhat pathetic) love lives, about how hard it is to find someone that you "feel butterflies" for. (All together now: awww!)

I don't entirely understand how someone so attractive as Jack is still single. It puzzles me! He is smart, funny, artistic, kind-hearted, has lots of interests, and is very handsome (some might even say "hot"). Ladies, if you want, I will hook you up- just let me know and I will review your resume.

By his own admission, he has a couple of barriers in place: holding extremely high--um, possibly unrealistic-- standards and not letting people get in too close. I actually got super sad when he told me this because Jack's just one of those guys that I have a real soft spot in my heart for, and I want to see him happy and in love. I mean, if we've learned anything from LOST it is that love is the most important thing in life; it is what connects us all, the only thing worth living or dying for.

Back to the butterflies. I totally agree with Jack that without that special, magical chemistry between two people, that nervous, butterflies-in-the-belly feeling that someone special causes you to feel when you are around him/her, the Love Train just isn't going to leave the station. And it's not something that can be forced, faked, or manufactured. Call it chemistry, call it butterflies, call it crazy- but it is unmistakable. It can happen instantly or it can start as a tiny spark and develop over time, but for me... for Jack... for pretty much anyone with the freedom to choose who they will give their heart to, it just has to be there. Who is to say that something that starts out so magical, so unexpected, cannot grow into the kind of love that lasts a lifetime, the kind that is a verb and outlasts external beauty and internal hurts? Isn't this the kind of love that we long for, even if we fear we will never experience it?

It would be easier in the short-term to brush this off as nonsense and just decide that love like this doesn't really exist, that it's nothing more than lust, but I disagree. I think that is a cop-out, a defense mechanism that We Who Have Been Burned use to keep our wounded hearts safe from future damage. But this wall around our hearts only does us more harm than good, and closes us off to the opportunity for love-- beautiful, ridiculous, stunning love. Two-way street love. Redemptive love. Second-chance love. Rare, yes, maybe. But REAL.

Jack, my friend, please do keep your heart open. And let there be butterflies for us all.